Friday, January 18, 2013

Time to start blogging again...


Why, hello there. I didn’t see you come in. Go on…get comfortable. It’s time to relax. And you know what that means. A glass of 1982, your favorite easy chair, and of course, this blog post. So go on, indulge yourself. That’s right! Kick off your shoes, put your feet up. Lean back and just enjoy the esthers. After all, beer soothes even the savage beast…

Okay, since we haven't blogged in a long time, here is a dump of recent events, thoughts, and therapuetic poetry...

Wellp, we totally found the place we want to open up. It’s in Burbank, it’s available, and it’s right off of the I-5 freeway. Yes, it’s spacious hole in the wall but we’re going to put some makeup on it and make that place the Ivory Tower. It’s right across the street from the AMC Theaters. So, that’s good……

But there’s always a but….

Our email went down in December. We’re working with Register.com to get it back up and operational but they completely SUCK! Worst customer service ever! Their answers to our inquiries are short and almost rude, like they’re annoyed that we’re inconveniencing them. 3 weeks without email for a business is unacceptable. They say they’ll have someone contact us but no one has called. I’ve called them. You bet your beautiful blue bonnets I have. They say the wait time to get ahold of someone is 45 minutes and I should leave a message to have them call me right back. If we didnt respond to you during the month of December, it's not because we don't like you, it's this. So, fair warning to all future business owners out there; do NOT use register.com for anything. You have been warned…. 

If you went to the Final 8-Bit Tournament last year, you got to sample our latest new entry: One-Eyed Willie Porter. It’s our tribute to the perfect film, The Goonies. In order to capture the film’s good vibes, we took French Oak chips soaked in Pirate Rum for weeks and then fermented our smoked grains over those chips. We used all Oregon hops. The new brew was well received and is now officially part of The Neverending Beer Factory canon. ßHey! Canon. Kinda like cannon. Like pirates. Pirates use cannons. Like One-Eyed Willie. There’s a joke somewhere there….

And lastly, we’re really going to try and keep to our blog-per-week methods. Our resident blogger was pulled away for months to do some NASA desert testing thing with rockets and stuff. Well, I’m back. It’s hard because when you say you’re going to start a brewery, you don’t expect that social media is part of that. But it is. We need a social mediator…like Cambria from Golden Road Brewing. That girl is all over the place and has, no doubt, contributed to the growing success of that brewery. We need a Cambria….

(Do you like how every paragraph ended with dots? Do you know why I did that? Neither do I. It might indicate that I need help.)